My favorite cee-ment ponds
Dear
Mark,
My sister and I love to spend the day by the pool before
we take in a little gambling in the evening. Since we are
going to Las Vegas next month, do you have any recommendations
of hotels that offer decent pools? Faye K.
Congratulations, Faye, for treating gambling more like a
time-killing recreational activity. All gamblers when coming
to Las Vegas should plan other activities like visiting
the Hoover Dam, the many fine shows, shopping, health clubs,
tennis or golf. Make it an enjoyable, entertaining trip,
not all gambling. Now for my favorite cee-ment ponds. I'll
first preface my choices by telling you that gray is my
favorite color, and I love inclement weather, not the heat
or intense sunshine of Las Vegas. But since you asked, my
preferred choices, for all the wrong reasons, are the swimming
holes at the Rio, the Mirage and the Tropicana: the Rio,
not because they actually have a sandy beach, but because
it's closest to my favorite buffet; the Mirage, not because
it's the place to be seen, but because I kept a room key
from a previous visit so when my friends stay in Vegas I
can sneak in; and finally, the Tropicana, not because it
has the largest pool or poolside blackjack, but because
if you walk up to the Island Winners Club, fill out a player
application, and gamble a minimal amount, they'll give you
a room for $39.95.
So based on what you just read, Faye, you really don't want my opinion. Instead, call the Las Vegas Chamber for hotel information at (800) 445-8864 and see what they recommend.
Dear
Mark,
Why is it that every time the dice fly off the table, the
next number to roll is the seven? Uncanny isn't it? Should
I bet on the seven every time the dice go off the game?
Robert N.
You would think, Robert, that every time you hear a dealer
call "It's on the ground, look around, it must be found"
or "Too tall to call" that the smart thing to
do would be to place a wager on the number seven because
you believe it's going to roll again. You'd be thinkin'
wrong, pardner. By making this wager part of your betting
repertoire, you could easily be joining the most pathetic
bunch of losers since my ninth grade remedial shop math
class. Why? Because the probability of a seven showing on
any roll, off the table or not, is only 16.67 percent. Forget
what you perceive. Each roll of the dice always remains
the same, an independent event. More bad news. The one-roll
wager on the seven is the worst bet on the crap table. Casino
advantage, 16.7 percent.
Sorry, Robert, what you perceive as happening all the time
is anecdotal evidence, not reality. Stay away from this
wager!
Dear
Mark,
I love the thrill and action of a casino. My wife, out of
fear of making mistakes and being harassed by other players,
prefers to sit in front of a slot machine. She avoids table
games like the plague. I can't even get her to play with
me on my favorite game, blackjack. Do many players have
this anxiety? Chuck L.
Anyone who has ever been chastised for hitting a 16 when
the dealer shows a five can appreciate the anonymity of
a slot machine. Your wife obviously prefers a non-threatening
environment where her decisions won't be second-guessed.
I'm with you, Chuck. I would love to see your wife experience
table games offering excellent bets for the player, but
who can blame her? Why get verbally abused for faulty draws
when a slot machine will allow her the freedom to play her
way, at her own pace, without harassment.
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